Book Meeting

Don’t Judge a Book…

So another gigantic lottery has come and gone.

Some lucky person has walked away with over fifty million dollars.

I received a scratch card from an insurance company in the mail yesteday. I didn’t bother to do anything with it at the time, so I brought it to work this morning with me.

I settled down, had some breakfast and took a gander at the card.

I scratched the card with my fork to reveal what I thought would be a try again or a better luck next time kind of message.

Instead, the following message was revealed…



GETAWAY


My heart skipped a beat.

I looked inside the card and read the message that said a vacation prize was up for grabs. A vaction prize worth up to six thousand dollars.

I began to sweat.

I logged into the website indicated on the card to see what I needed to do. It prompted me for a bunch of information, which I promptly filled out. After I submitted this data, a form popped up again, prompting me to enter the code word from the scratch card.

I typed in the word GETAWAY and prepared for my prize…



SORRY, THIS CODE WORD IS INVALID. BETTER LUCK NEXT TIME.


Yes.

So, I’m in a great mood now.

Bring on the junk mail!



A Meeting of the Minds

Tomorrow, I meet the Kris: blog celebrity and woman-about-town.

Dave and I always talk about how we have so many awesome bloggers on our links pages, and about how we would feel if we ever met them.

Admittedly (between the two of us), there are a number of stomach-butterfly-inducing scenarios revolving around meeting fellow bloggers

This may be one of them.

Kris recently met up with four other bloggers just a short while ago and had a great time. This just serves to increase the pressure on our get-together tomorrow night. I worry that I might come off as the human equivalent of Pablum*.

To combat this unease, I find it helpful to run through some scenarios in my mind before any meeting, be it work-related or non work-related.

Let’s see what we can see…



Scenario 1 – Jorge Loses His Comedic Timing

[Jorge walks into the meeting place where Kris specified. Jorge recognizes her and casually walks up. He’s feeling a little nervous. Kris stands up and smiles.]

Kris: Jorge? Nice to meet you!
Jorge: [His face twitches.] Your mama.
Kris: Huh?
Jorge: You wish!
Kris: Are you all right? You’re not making sense.
Jorge: [Giggling madly.] Cheque please.



Scenario 2 – Jorge Tries too Hard

[Jorge walks into the meeting place where Kris specified. Jorge recognizes her and casually walks up. He’s feeling a little nervous. He wanted to demonstrate all aspects of his personality to make a good impression. With this in mind, he decided to wear a three-piece suit, a fedora, a Superman cape and no shoes.]

Jorge: [Walking up to Kris.] Hi. You must be Kris.
Kris: [Shocked at his appearance. Fumbling words.] Pardon? I think you have me confused for someone else.
Jorge: [Removing his hat and scratching his head.] Well, you sure look like her. You’re even wearing the same clothes she said she’d be wearing.
Kris: [Hesitation gone now.] Nope. She left. She told me to tell you that she had to go home now. [To waiter.] Cheque Please!



Scenario 3 – The Unexpected

[Jorge walks into the meeting place where Kris specified. Jorge recognizes her and casually walks up. He’s feeling a little nervous. Kris stands up and takes the initiative.]

Kris: Are you Jorge?
Jorge: [Smiling.] Yes! Hi Kris. Nice to meet you! [Extends hand in greeting.]
Kris: [Takes Jorge’s hand. Squeezes with crushing force, causing Jorge to drop to his knees.] I have been sent from the future to kill you.
Jorge: [Wincing in pain.] WHAT? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

[Suddenly, several shots are fired. Kris loosens her grip as she has just been shot in the head. Jorge gawks. Kris’ head is splayed out in all directions, but slowly flowing back to re-form. A woman runs up, smoking gun in hand, and pulls Jorge away from the assassin. Jorge looks at his rescuer and sees…the real Kris!]

The Real Kris: [Looking at Jorge inquisitively.] Are you Jorge?
Jorge: [Rubbing the pain out of his crushed hand.] Yeah. What’s going on here?
The Real Kris: Come with me if you want to live.


Wow. The more scenarios I come up with, the more fun it seems this will be!

In all seriousness, I believe it will be a great time. It’s always fun meeting new folks, especially ones you sort of know from their writing (Ian & James – You guys rock. Jay – you are next!). I really enjoy reading Kris‘ work, and so I have a great deal of respect for her**.

I’ll post about it over the weekend if I can. Otherwise, it will be Monday.




* – Insult courtesy of Dave. He thought this up just for me.
** – Do yourself a favour and go read her blog! You’ll know what I’m talking about when you do.

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17 Responses

  1. I like the thoughts of you in a fedora and suit and cape. sounds dangereqsue:) (in keeping with our theme earlier:P)
    but you might wanna reconsider wearing shoes. I find they are helpful in keeping ones toes warm in the fall and winter season.
    ~Leah~

  2. Well, let me tell you, none of those scenarios indicate pablum. Insanity perhaps, definite neuroticism, but no pablum.

  3. The last scenario was hilarious 🙂 I hope your imagination doesn’t met realty. I’m sure you’ll have a great time.

    TTFN:)

  4. I say pair the outfit of scenario #2 with the sci-fi intensity of scenario #3. Just add beer, and stir!

  5. I hated you for beating me to the Kris-meet, but then you went and wrote that Terminator scenario and made me love you again.

    Hopefully when Kris reads this, she won’t stop at the point where she gets shot in the head. That would suck.

  6. although only one ticket one ..it was an office pool of about 17 people ..so that makes me feel slightly better ..i think ..

    did your superhero alter-ego ….see it here…

  7. So help me Goodness if you show up and are a cyborg I will never forgive Dave for his misleading email.

    I’m in town! Go CANADA!

    And Go Canada extra much for not being nearly as cold as Pennsylvania! Still, why do people have pools here? I saw like 80 from the plane and now want to move here. No one has pools in DC. Slip and slides, but no pools.

    I hope you don’t read this until tomorrow because you are home ironing your clothes and trimming your mutton chops for me.

    That’s what I’m going to do after closing out at the business center.

    Woohoo!

  8. Time to get SPAMMED!

  9. ♥~*D@quiry*~♥
    _____****__________**** ______
    ___***____***____***__ *** ____
    __***________****_______***____
    _***__________**_________***__
    _***_____________________***_
    _***_____________________***_
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    ___***__________________***____
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    ______***___________***_______
    ________***_______***_________
    __________***___***___________
    ____________*****_____________
    _____________***_____________
    ______________*_____________

  10. HEY!
    i think csenario 2 will work!!! haha:)
    enjoy and have fun
    kriss

  11. Hey hey there – u have yourself a little fun, hey? I’ll be sure to check out everyone’s space…lol

    Take care 🙂

  12. Oh, I envy you! It would be so much fun to meet someone that I read about every day.

    Good luck, I know that you’ll have a ton of fun!

    Have a great weekend, Jorge.

  13. PaSsIn ThRu

    …..oooO……………….
    … (……)… Oooo……..
    …..)…/. …(…..)………
    …..(_/…….)…/……….
    ………….. (_/………….
    .JUST PASSING THRU.
    …..oooO………………..
    … (……)… Oooo………
    …..)…/. …(…..)……….
    …..(_/…….)…/………..
    …………… (_/………….
    ……………………………

  14. Just thought I would stop by and say nice blog 🙂

    See Ya

  15. ATTENTION:

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    Leaving inane comments to whore yourself out is still considered SPAM.

  16. Too funny. We are in the middle of watching the second season of Buffy. In last night’s episode, a bounty hunter dressed up like a cop for career day at the high school calls out Buffy’s name. When Buffy answers, the bounty hunter pulls out a gun and tries to shoot her. Much fighting ensues. Great fun.

    Have a great weekend. Oh, and I don’t know if I would eat a carnivorous plant. Seems a little wierd . . .

  17. Well, Im surprized you didn’t to the Jurassic Park route! LOl

    Have a great time!
    Kelly

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