Lost In Translation

Posted on April 16, 2018 by Jorge

I was explaining to kiddo the other day that I used to study other languages back in university and after I answered her expected question as to which ones I had studied, she shot me a quizzical look – you know, the “yeah right” look. So, I thought that we could play a little game. I fired up Google Translate on my phone and set the input language to Russian and the output language to English. I then started a pattern: I would tell her an English phrase that I was going to speak in Russian, I would speak it into the app, and then she would see that the English translation was what I said it would be.

After a few minutes of this, she wanted to try her hand at speaking Russian. So, I would speak a Russian phrase and show her the result, and then I would get her to attempt the same phrase and we would see how well she did. It didn’t take long to find my favourite result. Continue reading →

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Jumping to Conclusions

Posted on October 23, 2011 by Jorge

Burned Unit

A few of my friends and I will (occasionally) take a perfectly innocent phrase in one of our conversations and turn it on it’s ear with some good ol’ innuendo (in YOU end oh). The following convo was with a friend of mine, to whom I loaned the season 1 DVD set of Burn Notice…



Booya! Click to make bigger (that’s what she said).


Of course, later on I thought about it – and it could have easily been referring to some kind of medical show. Ah well. Can’t win ’em all, right?


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Hold Your Applause

Posted on April 3, 2011 by Jorge

Armed and Dangerous

Sometimes I wonder if I’m going to be spending the afterlife in a very warm place.

Observe: a friend tweeted this…

I replied with this…

Anyone have an extra portable air conditioner they don’t need?

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The Funnier Way

Posted on March 8, 2011 by Jorge

Excuse Me, Sir. Your Daughter Just Said…

My daughter had a sleepover at Nana’s recently. It’s a great arrangement because Nana doesn’t live too far from where I work, so it’s just a matter of her dropping off little J to my office. Win-win, really; Nana gets to spend time with the wee one and I get a traveling partner for my commute.

On the subway, every station is announced several times beforehand (something to do with being sued when people miss their stops or something). More often than not, the on-board speakers are on the fritz and it’s hard to determine what they are saying. Here is a list of “translations” courtesy of my daughter.

TTC: The next stop is Christie. Christie Station.
Little J: Daddy! We’re going to Rice Krispies Station!

TTC: The next stop is Bathurst. Bathurst Station.
Little J: Daddy, are they really thirsty? They are bad thirsty? Is that what that means?

[This one is the most embarrassing one; only because it was declared very, very loudly.]

TTC: The next stop is Spadina. Spadina Station.
Little J: Daddy! That voice on the speaker just said ‘vagina’ two times!


Where’s Bill Cosby when you need him?


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Wit’s Beginning

Posted on November 27, 2010 by Jorge

Pearls of Wisdon

A snippet of a conversation today…

Jorge: You slept for a long time.
Little J: I’m still tired.
Jorge: Well, save it for tonight. Then you’ll have lots of energy to see Santa tomorrow.
Little J: Well, I don’t want to see him tomorrow.
Jorge: Whaaaat?
Little J: Yeah. I like sleep better than Christmas.
Jorge: Bwahahahahahaha!

To be fair, having a bad cold would make anyone love their precious sleep.


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