The Funnier Way

Excuse Me, Sir. Your Daughter Just Said…

My daughter had a sleepover at Nana’s recently. It’s a great arrangement because Nana doesn’t live too far from where I work, so it’s just a matter of her dropping off little J to my office. Win-win, really; Nana gets to spend time with the wee one and I get a traveling partner for my commute.

On the subway, every station is announced several times beforehand (something to do with being sued when people miss their stops or something). More often than not, the on-board speakers are on the fritz and it’s hard to determine what they are saying. Here is a list of “translations” courtesy of my daughter.

TTC: The next stop is Christie. Christie Station.
Little J: Daddy! We’re going to Rice Krispies Station!

TTC: The next stop is Bathurst. Bathurst Station.
Little J: Daddy, are they really thirsty? They are bad thirsty? Is that what that means?

[This one is the most embarrassing one; only because it was declared very, very loudly.]

TTC: The next stop is Spadina. Spadina Station.
Little J: Daddy! That voice on the speaker just said ‘vagina’ two times!


Where’s Bill Cosby when you need him?


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Sound Off

Can You Hear Me Now?

Public transit is a wonderful and scary place. It contains a wacky cross-section of the population; however it is also a confined area and will drive you batty if you are stuck with the wrong people.

Case in point: the loud talker.

Now, I have seen (heard) some interesting conversations on public transit, but the other day this one gal decided to get into a yelling match with whomever she was talking to on her cellphone. The subject was about how her conversation partner should not be yelling at her.

The best part is that she was screaming at the top of her lungs by the end and was holding the phone in front of her as if directing her yelling at the phone itself would help her win her argument. I didn’t feel sorry for her in the slightest when we entered a tunnel and the connection was severed.

I did, though, feel sorry for humanity as she stomped off the subway, announcing to everyone that she was going to go outside and call back whomever it was to give that person a piece of her mind.

It looks to be the only piece of a large whole, so it shouldn’t take too long.