Nature’s Berries

Kiddo and I play the Disney Edition of Trivial Pursuit from time to time, which involves us asking each other questions from different decks (I ask her the questions from “younger kids” deck, and she asks me questions from the “older kids” deck). Of course, game-play involves a fair amount of witty repartee (or trash talk, if you like). The other day we had an exchange that made us laugh so hard it felt worthy of a retelling. Continue reading

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Jumping to Conclusions

Burned Unit

A few of my friends and I will (occasionally) take a perfectly innocent phrase in one of our conversations and turn it on it’s ear with some good ol’ innuendo (in YOU end oh). The following convo was with a friend of mine, to whom I loaned the season 1 DVD set of Burn Notice



Booya! Click to make bigger (that’s what she said).


Of course, later on I thought about it – and it could have easily been referring to some kind of medical show. Ah well. Can’t win ’em all, right?


Armed and Dangerous

Ink This Wisdom

Little J has a very creative brain and a unique perspective that I can relate to. We were walking around today, enjoying the weather when we ran into a friend who has a dog. Little J said hi to both friend and canine, and as we continued she told me this…

Little J: Daddy, I think having more than one pet is too many pets.
Me: Really?
Little J: Yeah. It’s too much work. But, if you wanted to have more than one pet, you can take a magic pill that turns you into an octopus. Then you would have enough arms to take care of them.

That’s my kiddo.

Juicer

Tight Squeeze

Having children is like having access to a gold mine full of awesomeness. Not only do they come up with some hilarious dialogue, but they inspire us to explore our own inner child; that is, they help us remove the grown-up filter that usually remains intact in most day-to-day situations.

What’s even better is when you have friends with children that you can share your stories with; from these conversations, awesomeness is born…

Jorge: Little J made strawberry juice by squeezing Strawberry Shortcake. “Aaahhh! Fresh!”. I am sleeping with one eye open.
Krk: Take it out on Count Chocula for chocolate milk!
J: Hahahahah! I don’t even want to know how they make Bawls soda.


Job Descriptions

Obvious

I was in the car with Mrs. J and Little J last week when the following dialog took place…

Little J: Daddy, when it’s summer again next year I want to go to Centre Island to ride on the bumblebees.
Jorge: Yeah?
Little J: Yeah. And you can take pictures with your camera because you are the picture guy.
Jorge: I’m the picture guy, eh?
Little J: Yeah. You’re a picture-making machine.
Jorge: [Laughs.]
Little J: You are a picture-making machine just like I am a googie-making machine.
Jorge: [Laughs louder.]

We have all had bad colds recently, so she’s somewhat accurate about the googies.

Lewd Poisoning

What Goes In…

This is a conversation I had recently with a friend of mine. In the spirit of international comradeship, I am sharing this…

Jorge: Hey dude! How goes?
Jared: Had nasty food poisoning for the last two days.
Jorge: Never fun.
Jared: Like being on that machine that takes your life from Princess Bride.
Jorge: Yup. Except that it takes the life out of your body through your ass.
Jared: LOL!

I am such a sympathetic person.


Convopalooza

Is That the Date? Yikes!

So…

I haven’t posted in a while. Sue me.

I’ve been busy with other things, thus sending this place to the end of my list of priorities.

That being said, today I am going to post a whack of MSN conversations.

It’s not much, I know, but enjoy!



President Evil

My friend Shatton talking about his complicated approach to Resident Evil 4



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Fatality

One of the rare occasions where we had more than two people in a chat window at once. It’s rare for good reason, apparently…



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Hot Brown…

My friend Shatton has game nights every friday at his place. Due to me being busy half the time, I tend to miss out on the fun. Here he tries to entice me…



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Sleep? That’s Where I’m a Viking!

I enjoy utilizing the drawing feature of MSN Messenger.

Observe as I render a true-to-life portrait of Dave



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Does Not Compute…

Kim and I were having a perfectly civil conversation when my silly sense of humour hijacked our window and drove us to the state of insanity…



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Smashed

Rituro and I share a love of gaming. We also share a love of Hulk-dominated conversations…



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Friends

Here is a conversation between Kelly and I about friendship…



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TMI

Not content with our previous level of insight, Kelly and I change gears…



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Priorities

Here I demonstrate to Tug that I have a one-track mind…



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Pan-Dimensional

Did you know that Dr. Beth is a being who can defy the laws of physics? I sure didn’t…



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