Shoulda Coulda Woulda…
I was reminded the other day of the negative power of certain words.
A friend of mine was blogging about how she felt as if she was missing something out of life. This something could be broken down into several social conventions that have become unspoken rules.
This can be a problem to those that may not necessarily adhere to these conventions. Who is to say that a person must fall in love in a certain time? Is it unacceptable for a girl to ask a guy to marry her, instead of the other way around? Is it a crime to be single?
Social rules are one thing, but some of the conventions that go along with them are not really applicable to everyone. People toss around the word should a lot. And this is the actual crime.
Should I not be happily married by the time I am 30? Do you think I should ask her to marry me? What do you think I should do?
A lot of people have told me about the negative power of this word. I have also read and heard similar dialogue from various intelligent people in the media.
We give too much power to the thought of doing what everyone expects us to do that we forget what will make us happy. Certainly it is no crime to buck the conventions that we grew up with. That’s called progress. Without people deviating from the norm, we wouldn’t be fighting for racial and sexual equality or for marriages for all orientations (to name a few). We would all be the same. We would all be dwelling in mediocrity.
Even social rules can be changed over time. So why plan your life according to convention?
If you are always wondering what you should do, you’ll never actually do anything.
Filed under: Ponderings, Spaces Archive | 5 Comments »
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