The Eagles Fish Nights. Morning Market Totems Knife Departures At the End

Now we will continue (and conclude) the story of the camping weekend that I started previously. There is a point form (and in my opinion much funnier version) at Dave’s blog. Go check it out.

Here we go…



The Eagles Have Landed

Tien and Natalie arrived shortly after and gave Mrs. J and I our steaks. They set up their tent, and then we all proceeded to just hang out.

Camping is funny. Normally I don’t really like just sitting around. I’m usually engaged in some activity or another. However, with camping, I don’t mind just sitting there. Mind you, it’s much more fun to sit there when under the influence…

The liberal mixing of alcohol and Crystal Lite began shortly after the hanging out period. As Dave mentions in his blog, you can never bring too much alcohol. Be that as it may, it is a heavy commodity, and bringing too much can result in a lot of residual back pain.

We usually mix about 250 mL of alky with 750 ml of juice. This ends up being refreshing and dangerous. That’s when the fun happens.



Something Fishy This Way Comes

Brad and I decided to go out fishing before dinner. We ended up paddling around a lot and we got quite a number of nibbles but nothing too promising.

It reminded me of our trip back in May, except in May we caught fish every ten seconds…

Brad is an amazing guy. He can paddle for an almost infinite amount of time and he knows so much about everything in nature it’s quite sickening.

This is due to the fact that he was raised by wolves and porcupines. He also has gills (as well as gloves for hands).

We had a good time paddling around, and I almost caught a fairly sizeable Lake Trout. I had him in front of Brad’s net when he spat the hook and swam away.

On our way back to the campsite, we trawled a bit. A surprise was in store for us as we passed over a shallow part of the lake…


Brad: You might want to pull your line up, dude. Seems to be shallower here.
Jorge: I see what you mean.
Brad: Yeah. I’m definitely going to reel in before my hook gets caught on the vegetation. [Reels in and continues paddling.]
Jorge: [Feeling a tug, attempting to read the line.] Hmmm. Looks like I’ve got a weed..
[Stares down in the water to see what is on his hook and sees a Lake Trout.]
Jorge: Or maybe a fish!
Brad: Holy! Nice! Get him back here.
[Jorge swings it over to Brad who nets the thing. After subduing it, we were satisfied with the knowledge that we were not going back empty-handed.]



Night Falls

When we got back to the campsite, quite a number of our friends were quite hammered. It was pretty entertaining. It didn’t take long for me to grab my own ride to spinsville.

Mrs. J delegated the task of making mashed potatoes (from a dry mix) to me. In my slightly inebriated state, I made a soupy mess of it. It was only by combining other people’s potato mix into my own that I managed to at least have something that would stay on my spoon.

After washing and drying the dishes, we enjoyed a nice campfire (started by Lorraine the pyro), hung out and told jokes.

Every year Dave and I seem to come up with something of a motif for the weekend. There is usually a song, a joke, and some quotes from television shows that we like.

Last year, the theme song was the Venga Bus song (which you might recognize from the Six Flags commercial with that crazy old man who dances like a freak). This year, the theme song seemed to be Hey Ya. Rubber Johnny’s noises and several other obscure quotes from Rejected were also used quite frequently.

We ended up going to bed relatively early that night. Dave, Brad and I shacked up in the Taj Mahal of tents (Dave’s Wenger Tent), and we all slept relatively well.



Where is the Morning?

The morning arrived, and I was up and out the tent door by about 05:45. There was an extremely dense fog sitting on the water. It came right up to the rocky point and formed a big, white wall. One could barely see through this thick pea soup.

It was pretty cool. I snapped some photographs, and then kept Brad company after he woke up.

Everyone woke up eventually, and we all had our separate breakfasts.

Brad had to leave before noon as he had some business to attend to elsewhere, but he promised to return…


Brad: I’ll see you guys tomorrow? Probably in the afternoon.
Jorge: You bringing back alky?
Brad: Yup. Anyone else want anything?
Nat: Oh! Freezies!
Brad: Okay…
Nat: And a bucket of chicken…


You can tell that we have a real sense of roughing it when we camp.



The Stock Market Ploy

I figured I would go bathe with the biodegradable camp soap. Dave needed to bathe as well, so we headed off into the lake together as there is safety in numbers. You can never be too careful with leeches about.

The water was cool, but refreshing. We swam around for a bit and then set our feet down in water that came up to our stomachs. We passed the bottle of soap back and forth, washing hair, arms, etc.

The two of us were the only ones on the lake, as everyone else was back up the hill at the main campsite.

And so the awkward portion of washing sensitive bits had arrived. We looked around and wordlessly turned away from each other, getting ready to clean the nether regions…


Jorge: Ah yes. The washing of privates.
Dave: Yeah.
Jorge: Good thing there is no one around, otherwise we’d have to come up with some kind of ploy to make them stop paying attention to us.
[As if on cue, everyone comes down to the rocky point to hang out.]
Jorge: Shit.
Dave: [Laughs nervously] Nice.
Jorge: We need a distraction.
Dave: [Turns to face the crowd while obviously washing sensitive parts underwater] My, the stock market is quite active today! All my stocks are up!
Jorge: [Also cleaning the naughty parts.] My Exxon shares? In the pooper! Not doing so well!

[Jorge & Dave laugh hysterically, garnering more attention with the ploy than if they had said nothing at all…]



The Totem

Mrs. J and Isha each had a copy of the latest Harry Potter book (Mrs. J was borrowing Brad’s) and were reading down on the shore. Dennis and Lorraine had gone fishing. Nat was reading as well, and Tien was napping (Tien is either being super-athletic, eating meat, or napping).

And Dave?

Well, he was trying his hand at carving.

He took a cut log and started picking at it with his knife. Then he started using a hatchet (at my insistence) to carve out larger chunks. Finally, he used to hatchet to hammer his knife like a chisel.

He eventually carved what he called The Totem and he kept making strange laughing noises as he held it up for us to see…






Lorraine’s double-ended Dreidel of Doom was much more aesthetically pleasing, and deadly.


The Knife Game and the Sing-a-Long

Later on in the afternoon I was puttering around the campsite in the afternoon when I came across Dave and Tien throwing their buck knives at the ground.

Dave had drawn a circle in the dirt with his foot, and they were attempting to stick the knives as close to the middle as possible. They were only standing 6 feet away (at most) from the target.

They looked ridiculous.

So obviously I had to join them.

We later graduated to throwing knives at a stump. It didn’t really go all that well and resulted in us doing damage to our knives.

Isha needed to use the thunderbox which was located just up the hill from our knife throwing range…


Isha: Hey guys. I need to use the thunder box.
Jorge: Okay…
Isha: Well, would you mind kinda leaving for a bit?
Jorge: No problem. We’ll leave you in peace. Or would you rather have music? We could sing for you from afar if you want…
Isha: [Laughing.] Whatever. Sure. I have to go though.
[Isha runs up the hill as we walk in the other direction. Dave clears his throat…]
Dave: [Singing lead part of barbershop quartet.] In Moonlight Bay…
Jorge: [Smiling] Barbershop?
Dave: Sure.
Jorge: Give ‘er.
[They begin to sing barbershop style. Dave singing one part, and Jorge echoing another. I can’t really do it justice here, but I’ll type out the first song so you get an idea of the lyrics…]
Dave: In Moonlight Bay…
Jorge: Isha went up the hill…
Dave: We were sailing along…
Jorge: To the thunder box…
[Isha is heard laughing from atop the hill…]


It became another annoying theme. We sang a bunch of stuff that way. One of us would sing the first line, and then the other would have to fill in the echoing lines with lyrics that reflected the lead lines. It became a game of sorts…

And everyone had another reason to hate us…

The rest of the day was spent playing cards and accompanying Dennis on a downward spiral to getting loaded. Lorraine just shook her head (and rolled her eyes*) as Dennis kept dropping B-Bombs everywhere all gansta style. After an evening of singing, weirdness, and just hanging around, we all hit the sack.



Departure and Arrival

Dennis and Lorraine had to leave early because Dennis had work that he needed to finish. We bid them a fond farewell.

After I gave Nat a quick lesson in sterning, her, Isha and Tien decided to paddle out to another portage along the lake and go for a short hike.

The weather was slowly becoming windier.

Brad eventually made it back, and he was exhausted due to the fact that he was paddling against the wind for most of his journey (solo, I might add). Amazingly, he brought enough freezies for everyone, andthey were still relatively frozen!

Eventually, everyone had come back and we had a relatively quiet day. Dave and I were still cracking wise, though…


Brad: Man, where do you guys get the energy?
Mrs. J: [Shakes head] *sigh*
Isha: It’s like they never run out.
Brad: It’s like the Dave and Jorge show. All the time. And the commercials are Dave and Jorge.
[Everyone laughs.]
Brad: We interrupt this regularly scheduled Dave and Jorge program to bring you some late-breaking Dave and Jorge!



The End of Days

During the evening, we burned Dave’s totem, most likely invoking the wrath of the gods of the forest.

Early on Monday morning, the distant rumble of thunder could be heard. I happened to be in a state of wakefulness due to the pressure change in the air. I was also feeling gassy, and took advantage of everyone’s slumber to relieve some of the pressure.

Little did I know that Tien was actually awake, giggling to himself at the noises I was making.

After about the second expulsion, I fell asleep briefly, only to be awakened by the loudest roar of thunder I have ever heard, and a bright flash at the same time.

Everyone was awake (I wonder if Tien thought it was more of my gas?), and all went silent until…


Brad: Somebody hold me.


We all had a good laugh. The rain came, and went. Packing up was pretty uneventful in the morning. The return paddle passed with no incident as well.

We all went to the Portage Store for our traditional after-trip burgers and beer.

After we finished, we all said goodbye and went our separate ways.


As always it was a good trip. Every year it seems to get better. I wonder where we will be next year?

I’ve obviously omitted** a lot, but I doubt that you’d want to hear all of it. 🙂



* – Funny enough, our wives are exceptionally good eye rollers. I suspect that we husbands do so many dumb things that their eye-muscle strength would be such that they could lift pianos just with a flick of their occular orbs.
** – One thing that I wish I could take away are the bug bites. Usually I complain a lot about them during the trip. This year, I tried to ignore them. Nothing works to dissuade these little bitey bastards from exacting revenge for God-knows-what on my skin. I successfully ignored them for the most part, but man, am I paying for it now…

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20 Responses

  1. Visited your photo web page,, stunning!!!
    Come by and see my space ..
    Take care
    Pam

  2. I have never sang Barbershop quartet style whilst backcountry camping… Will have to try that after many beer(s) next time.
    Washing ones privates in Newfoundland in June, while camping = painful! A lake sounds divine for the washing of the naughty bits.
    And now I have this fantasy of reading the latest Harry Potter in front of a campfire. Now that I think of it, that is the only way to do it.
    Excellent tale my friend. Felt like I was there….
    Cheers
    ~ian

  3. Thanks for dropping by..oh, and I liked your little camping story lol..have a good day

  4. Hey just dropping by to say hello and see how you’re doing.
    You may think I’m hard to keep up with with my posts… But I’d say we’re even because you always post a nice story worth a ten minute read.
    I’m way too restless right now to read all of your stories for today. So for now I’ll just say good morning. I’ll be back later when I’m putting off giving the dogs a bath for a good read, and your stories always are a good read.
    Have a good day!

  5. Awww Jorge your camping trip sounds so much fun. I really want to go camping now. Look what you’ve done. Hopefully there wouldnt be any weird curse on you from burning the totem:P muwhahaha. im kidding of course. Its early….you cant hold anything I say against me…. I just woke up and havent had coffee yet:)
    until next time

    ~Scovix~

  6. Had my doubts about you pulling off the Stock Market bit, but it was great! Now all we need is everyone else on the trip to write a post and we’ll have covered every single possible facet of the trip. Mrs. J, you next.

  7. Thanks for stopping by and leaving such a nice comment. Feel free to visit anytime. I’m really enjoying my visit to your space. I have a special affection for photographers, so would you mind if I linked to you on my page? Just let me know if you’d prefer that I didn’t.
    I’d take part in your contest this afternoon but i’m going to be at work, and i’ll miss getting the chance to be #40 lol It’s my birthday next week, so maybe I could sweet talk a print off of you that way 😉 lol
    Anyway, have a great day… take care,
    Karen

  8. Ahhh, alcohol. That which makes us all great singers, and very funny people.

  9. Hi Jorge,
    I’m unsure as to why you felt the need to apologize for something that happened over a week ago. As you know, everything has pretty much blown over and I’d like to think that Lin & I have gotten passed my stressed-out & assinine attack on her. Any other posts I made to other people, though, I stand behind and no other apologies will be coming from me.
    Hope your day is good & your week is quick.

  10. On Moonlight Bay! My sister and I use to sing that ALL THE TIME when we were kids. I’d forgotten about it. We also sang Down By the Old Mill Stream all the time also.

    And Jorge, I’d never hate you for for being a flesh, errr I mean meat eater. 🙂 I’m originally a Kansas Girl farm girl. We slaughtered a cow every fall so we’d have meat all winter till the next slaughtering. (We only used half the cow for our family of four. Another family bought the other half.) I never actually liked eating the meat when I was a kid… but that’s a different story.

  11. Lmaooooooo….what a great post……

    “Something fishy this way comes….”….classic!

    Yelling, “Bear!” or something might have worked better as a distraction while washing though……just an idea, of course….lolololol

    And Ian…you have no right to say anything about Barbershop music O’ Mighty Rick Astley fan….give me the barbershop……

    Lastly…I once used an outdoor toilet at a campground, only to discover later, much to my dismay, that it had apparently been infested with chiggers…….I had over 130 chigger bites. If you’re not familiar with chigger bites, they are 10 times worse than any mosquito bite…they are tiny, tiny, tiny little microscopic bugs that burrow under your skin and the only way to kill them is to suffocate them which involves painting each bite with a special medication or clear fingernail polish etc….which by the way, they really itch then. Let me tell you….you have ZERO dignity left when you have to strip down and lay naked spread eagle on a bed while someone plays dot to dot with fingernail polish all over your ass…..arrggghhhhh. Sorry for that visual…lol.

    Hmmm……I should maybe blog about that…lololol…might be better than llamas.

    You crack me up, Jorge.

    And that’s a good thing!

    Paige :o)

  12. Hello again… So, it turns out that my friend Tara is doing a “Spread the love” day. I figure that we could all use more love. After all, there’s no such thing as too much.
    Anyway… stop by Tara’s page to sign up and help spread the word and spread the love.
    spaces.msn.com/members/pixie1984

    There’s also a link to her page on my page.

  13. Oh Jorge you always delight with your story telling!
    Nat

  14. Great story Jorge.

    It was cool to read yours and Dave’s. Even though it seems you were inseparable all weekend, his was a different perspective. Hi description of the food was hilarious.

    Stock Market Ploy was very funny. Just one question…..if everyone was standing around, how did you two get out of the water??? 😉

    Oh and knife throwing while inebriated and a canoe ride away from motorized transportation to a hospital……probably not the brightest thing you’ve ever done. 😀

    Burgers & Beer at the portage store, eh? I’ll have to keep that in mind.

    🙂

  15. Hey!

    Awsome read!! sounds like a bucket of fun!! I havent gone camping in AGES..I really need to get back to that. Anywho, Thx for the comment about my shots..i am pretty happy with those..and that’s saying something.

    Well Cheers doll!

    Nadine

  16. 1) Dave and I were not naked when we were washing.

    2) We also weren’t inebriated while knife throwing…Although…THAT sounds like a cool idea….

  17. Hey Jorge….

    Nice Camping story….I love washing my hair in the lake….its so refreshing!!!!

    I like the bio soap…lol ( I have these crazy people up at the cottage who are like soap cops and that reminded me of them….lol

    Nice blog…..Have a great day and keep in touch!

    Cheers
    Diana

  18. Thanks for stopping by my space!!! Thanks for the idea of the “threesome” for the annoying old lady next door…We will have to “spread the word” and see how she likes that!!!
    I love your pictures!!!
    Paula

  19. Jorge… I have ALWAYS wanted to go in-country at the ‘Gonk… I had an opportunity to go with my Uncle a number of years back, but I proceeded to break my leg and ruin the whole thing!

    If you ever have a space, let me know. I would be happy to add my voice to the barbershop! 🙂

    Sounds like an awesome time.

    James.

  20. Storms and camping… is there anything better?
    This was a great post- almost as good as going camping myself… almost.

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