Millions of Pears. Pears For Me
The other night I went shopping for groceries. We have several 24-hour grocery stores in the vicinity, so if one needs to refill the larder, it’s not a big task.
I figured I’d go down to Sobeys, but I ended up taking a wrong turn, and ended up in a traffic jam on an expressway.
Eventually, I ended up at a Dominion and proceeded to shop. After spending almost an hour in the traffic jam (at 1 AM no less) I had forgotten what we had at home in terms of fruit, so I ended up getting a basket of pears, not realizing that we already had a basket at home.
I’ve been averaging 3-4 pears a day.
All I can say is…
PEARS!
Flowery Observation
Yesterday my wife was having a bad day.
I decided to get her some flowers*, so I stopped off at the flower shop in the concourse level of the building I work in.
I picked up a bunch of Gerber Daisies with some greenery and headed home.
As I walked, I noticed that women I walked past would smile at me. Or maybe they would just smile and happened to be looking sort of at me because I was holding the flowers (which is what they were most likely looking at).
It was a strange phenomenon.
And I’m not talking about a few women. I’m talking about every woman I walked past.
It was a little unnerving.
My brain was formulating a hypothesis…
BRAIN CELL 1: It appears that upon seeing flowers, women become happy!
BRAIN CELL 2: Indeed. This is a most interesting discovery.
BRAIN CELL 3: How could we not have known this before?
BC1: Not sure, chap. Not sure at all.
So, is it safe to say that to make women happy, we should buy them flowers?
BC3: I don’t think the wife would really appreciate us spending money on other women, even if it would make the world a better place.
BC1: Yes. But it seems that just holding the flowers and walking makes women happier, if only for the time they see us carrying the flowers.
BC3: You might have something there.
BC1: Well, I’m not just good-looking, you know.
BC2: I’m just writing this down…women…complete strangers…see flowers…carry the one…
BC1: We might have ourselves a new law!
ALL: Hooray!
Good old brain.
Always thinking.
Anyhow, another thing I noticed is that guys that caught sight of the bouquet would have one of two reactions…
- A guilty look
- An angry look
What’s up with that?
BC2: Have you noticed how many guys are glowering in our direction?
BC3: It is odd, isn’t it?
BC1: Oh! Oh! New law!
BC3: Indeed!
BC2: Men will feel negative emotions when looking at other men carrying flowers.
BC1: Weird.
The most amusing reactions, though, were the guys with their gals. Here’s the play-by play.
- Couple walking along.
- Girl sees flowers I’m carrying and smiles.
- Guy with girl sees girl smiling at me.
- Guy looks at me and scowls.
- Guy holds girl’s hand.
- Guy moves closer to girl.
Like I’m going to steal your lady, Chuck. One guy on the subway even turned to his girlfriend and held both of her hands, desparately trying to hold her gaze.
Sometimes I’m ashamed to be a guy.
* – Yes, folks. Sometimes you can get people flowers for no other reason than to make them smile…
Filed under: General Dialogue, Ponderings, Spaces Archive | 18 Comments »
Barking Space 