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Hai-Kuul – June 06, 2005 – Part 2 – Contest Winner & More!

Posted on June 6, 2005 by Jorge

The Hai-Kuul Contest is Done!

That’s right. The 25th entry was received this morning. The runner up was VisitingSweethonesty for submitting the request that lead to the 250th haiku. She will win a 4×6 print of the morning scene.



The Winner

The winner receives an 8×10 glossy print of the morning scene. And here is her request…


That’s Enough (Requested by Drea)
You’ve filled my soup bowl
For a second time. But I
Am not that hungry


Nicely done, Drea!

I will need both of your mailing addresses, so just e-mail me and we can arrange to get your prints to you!

Congrats go out to both of the winners. Stay tuned, as I will have a 500th haiku contest in what appears to be a short time indeed!


Hai-Kuul Queen (Requested by Drea)
The battle is on
Which gal will request the most?
My brain is jello


Blondisma (Requested by Drea)
A rare condition
Of implied stupidity
It is not true, though


Bamaram (Requested by Drea)
Is this word from Hook?
Or could it possibly be
Some Persian music?


Heave Away (Requested by Drea)
The drinks went down fast
I’m running to the bathroom
I hope I make it


Mark My Words (Requested by Drea)
You’ve lost count of how
Many times you have heard this.
The mantra of moms


I Will Win (Requested by Drea)
Determination
A strong and unyelding soul
It’s all in the mind


Pyromaniac (Requested by Drea)
Lighting matches rocks
I could stare at a campfire
And I’d lose myself


Slinky (Requested by Drea)
What walks down the stairs
And makes a slinkety sound?
A slinky, I bet!


Toast To Jorge (Requested by Drea)
Let us raise a glass
To…er…me…and how much I
Er…totally rock!


Twenties (Requested by Drea)
The wonderful age
Between teenhood and mid-life
Where youth is enjoyed


Enough (Requested by Drea)
The title of this
Is very similar to
A recent title


Toe Stubbage (Requested by Drea)
I hate the corners
I think that furniture should
Float high off the ground


Thirteen is Unlucky (Requested by Drea)
Irrational fear
Triskaidekaphobia
Why fear a number?


The Columbian Navy (Requested by Ian)
Don’t mess with these guys
They have very large cannons
That fire sacks of coke


You should read Ian’s blog for the full story of this next one…


Poppin’ Wheelies (Requested by Ian)
Some handicapped folks
Can do the wickedest things
With their rolling chairs


Shirtless Santa (Requested by Ian)
This Santa is cut
He preaches about fitness
So many pushups!


Rat Man (Requested by Ian)
Nathan Phillip’s Square
There is a man with his rats
They’re his family


Snarky is As Snarky Does (Requested by TheresaWarriorPrincess)
Don’t treat me poorly
Your attitude will just be
Reflected right back


Monday Morning (Requested by TheresaWarriorPrincess)
I hate waking up
And having to face the day
When it’s Monday morn


Smooth Teeth (Requested by TheresaWarriorPrincess)
It’s like hairy teeth
But this time the sugar makes
Your teeth feel slimy


Where’s My Ten Foot Pole When I Need it? (Requested by TheresaWarriorPrincess)
I SO hate that guy
He is very disgusting
Where is that damned pole?


Waiting For the Rain… (Requested by TheresaWarriorPrincess)
The ground is quite dry
The people are all so parched
They look to the sky


French Manicure (Requested by TheresaWarriorPrincess)
A way to pamper
And it’s different than a
Spanish manicure


I’m With Stupid -> (Requested by TheresaWarriorPrincess)
Check out my buddy
He thinks that popsicles are
Sugary weapons


In that line of thought…


You Deserve a Popsicle (Requested by TheresaWarriorPrincess)
Your criminal acts
Will earn you a proper death
With this popsickle


Beasties (Requested by TheresaWarriorPrincess)
You will see them out
In the wild. Running free and
Pooing everywhere


Beautiful Eyes (Requested by TheresaWarriorPrincess)
Nothing is as sweet
As staring into a pair
Of beautiful eyes


Qui Moi? (Requested by TheresaWarriorPrincess)
Whether in English
Or even in the French tongue
Trouble will find you


Born On Friday the Thirteenth (Requested by TheresaWarriorPrincess)
People say my luck
Is of the worst kind due to
The day I was born


SpellCheckMate (Requested by TheresaWarriorPrincess)
You have backed yourself
Into a literary
Corner. Surrender!




*Remember, you can submit a topic to inspire your very own Haiku Poem by clicking here. You can read about Hai-Kuul here.

Filed under: Announcements, Hai-Kuul, Spaces Archive | 12 Comments »

Fig-tionary – June 06, 2005

Posted on June 6, 2005 by Jorge

ingoring (Requested by princess_castle)

  1. Function: transitive verb – piercing from the inside of something with the intention of escaping – Usage: Jack was swallowed by the giant, and only by ingoring the giant – with a sharpened popsicle stick – was he able to escape.


welocome (Requested by princess_castle)

  1. Function: transitive verb – to accept with surprise yet also pleasure the occurrence or presence of a person, usually with a voiced “oh” – Usage: Margaret dropped by Jack’s place unexpectedly, but he welocomed her with open arms.


dona (Requested by princess_castle)

  1. Function: adjective – To be done with an Italian accent (most notably Joe Avati) – Usage: “I’m dona, ” said Joe, finishing the last bite of his lasagna.




*Remember, you can submit a request for a crazy definition for a typo by clicking here. You can read about the Fig-tionary here.

Filed under: Fig-tionary, Spaces Archive | 1 Comment »

Hai-Kuul – June 06, 2005

Posted on June 6, 2005 by Jorge

In the course of interpreting requests, I do tend to take a little bit of creative license with some of what I receive. Some of these might be spelling mistakes, for example, that I will correct if I feel that it is the intention of the requestor. Sometimes I leave them, as they make a more interesting poem.

Enjoy!

U Got it All Wrong (Requested by princess_castle)
What do you mean five?
I gave you twenty. You must
Give me ten for change!


I Am Not a Pre-Hitoric Creature (Requested by princess_castle)
I’m not one of those
It’s not even a real word
You just made that up


Three Black Cats and Rain (Requested by ksgrrl)
Three poor, soaked felines
Trapped in the deluge outside
At least they’re now clean


Horse Rides On the Beach (Requested by WizenedDragonPK)
Sweet, relaxed freedom
It’s a joy to be leaving
Hoofprints in the sand




*Remember, you can submit a topic to inspire your very own Haiku Poem by clicking here. You can read about Hai-Kuul here.

Filed under: Hai-Kuul, Spaces Archive | 3 Comments »

Dealing With a Dilemna

Posted on June 4, 2005 by Jorge

The Aircraft Dilemna

I was cruising around the other night on Spaces, just checking out (at random) new people’s blogs using the Updated Spaces window you can find on some people’s blogs. I always read a few entries and leave comments. I am obsessed with commenting (They say that admitting you have a problem is the first step).

I came upon a young man’s blog. He was quite young. Fifteen, I think. His life was full of problems, and he wrote about them with unabashed honestly. The thing that struck me about this fellow is that he seemed to be more concerned about his best friend.

I wont get into specifics, but an analogy will bring light to my point. Imagine a person has been poisoned, and they have a limited amount of time to live. They are running to the hospital, but yet they stop to help another person pick up a bag of groceries they just dropped. It’s rare to find that kind of fearless selflessness these days, especially in the young.

I left a small comment that I hope he will take to heart: It is important to help yourself before you can help another.

It’s important to remember that if we are not in the right frame of mind (or body), it’s tough to help someone else. Certainly it can be inspiring, and probably perceived as a bit selfless as well. However, the less we take care of our own needs the less time we will be able to help others. It’s a simple fact. Perhaps an analogy is in order…

If you have ever flown on a large aircraft, you will probably remember the safety presentation at the beginning involving decreased cabin pressure. Oxygen masks are supposed to drop from the ceiling for your use. If you have children they tell you to put your own oxygen mask on yourself first, and then put one on your child.

I remember the first time I saw this. It was counterintuitive to me. Upon deeper inspection, though, it made a lot of sense. That few extra seconds that you spend on helping yourself may cause your child to lose consciousness, but then they’ll have the mask and all will be fine.

The alternative is that you put the mask on your child, and then you lose consciousness. If your child doesn’t know how to help you, you are out of luck. Your child will be robbed of a parent.

This simple logic applies to everyday life.

It’s good to help others, but make sure you are in a position to do so. Helping yourself will make you strong enough to help out others in a more effective manner. It’s not selfish. Nor is it wrong.

Take care.

Filed under: Ponderings, Spaces Archive | 14 Comments »

Hai-Kuul – June 03, 2005

Posted on June 3, 2005 by Jorge

Guest Book (Requested by -deadites-)
When you visit me
Leave a piece of you behind
Please write in the book


Not Anymore (Requested by princess_castle)
You never listen
I’m closing this chapter now
And walking away


Drowned (Requested by princess_castle)
You are all around
You saturate my senses
Now it is too much


There Was (Requested by princess_castle)
A long time ago
I remember my grandpa
Cheating at card games


Thx! But No… (Requested by princess_castle)
You offer peanuts
But I’m allergic to them
Thanks, but you keep them


Just To Be Nice (Requested by princess_castle)
Take the time to smile
Help people for no reason
Make a better world


No Need To Please Me (Requested by princess_castle)
It’s nice that you try
But I’m happy as I am
Save Your Energy


So What… (Requested by princess_castle)
You argued with me
Pepsi is better than Coke
I don’t really care


Something Wrong With Her (Requested by princess_castle)
Her eyes lack lustre
And her bruises speak of pain
I hope she’s okay


They Don’t Date (Requested by princess_castle)
They laugh and cuddle
But they’ve never shared a kiss
I guess they’re just friends


I Am Indian (Requested by princess_castle)
I come from a place
With over a billion folks
Who eat jalebis


I’m not sure if Michaelmage meant for this to be an entry, but I took it as such…


Happy Guest Book Signing Day (Requested by Michaelmage)
Another blog “thing”
I’m too busy for this stuff
Writing my haiku


I Hate Sales Reps (Requested by My Wife)
All day they’re babbling
About how much they rake in
And yet they don’t work


Don’t Leave Three Minute Voicemails (Requested by My Wife)
You just called me up
And left too huge a message
Get to the point, dick


Shut the Fuck Up (Requested by My Wife)
You are in my face
And you are making no sense
You know where to go


Snowfall In July (Requested by TeresaDawn-Armetiel)
Why is it snowing?
It is so improbable
Here in Florida




*Remember, you can submit a topic to inspire your very own Haiku Poem by clicking here. You can read about Hai-Kuul here.

Filed under: Hai-Kuul, Spaces Archive | 9 Comments »

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