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Starting Perfect Note

Starting the Year Off Right

I recently saw Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. I remember Dave telling me that it was pretty good, so I didn’t think twice about seeing it. All in all it was a good movie. I enjoyed it immensely.

Some of the moments, though, were a little odd.

Observe as Dave and I exchange witty e-mails about one such moment (there may be a spoiler: BE YE WARNED)…



To: Dave
From: Jorge
Subject: Thoughts about Harry Potter

Moaning Myrtle is a perv.


To: Jorge
From: Dave
Subject: RE: Thoughts about Harry Potter

Yeah, and I don’t recall the words “Myrtle reached deftly around Harry’s blocking arms and touched his dick” appearing anywhere in the novel.


To: Dave
From: Jorge
Subject: RE: RE: Thoughts about Harry Potter

Dude…
Did we see the same movie?


To: Jorge
From: Dave
Subject: RE: RE: RE: Thoughts about Harry Potter

Harry Potter and the Gobble-It of Ire?



This was so funny it warranted a phone call. While we were laughing about what Dave typed, I was looking up the actress who played moaning myrtle because she looked familiar…


Jorge: Shirley Henderson is her name. She played Moaning Myrtle.
Dave: She looks familiar.
J: She’s been in Bridget Jones’ Diary and the sequel.
D: Really?
J: Yes. She plays one of Bridget Jones’ friends, I think.
D: Wow. She’s older than she looks.
J: Totally. She was in Trainspotting.
D: What?
J: Yeah. She was Gail.
D: I think I remember her character.
J: Holy crap. You’re right about being older than she looks!
D: How old?
J: Born in 1965.
D: Wow. Oldie.
J: That’s, like, thirty-one years old!
D: Er…
J: Or maybe forty-one years old with math!


You think you know someone…



Picture Perfect

My friend Solaria has started an experiment of sorts. It’s a photography blog. Well, it’s most likely much more than that. She is talented behind the camera and on the keyboard in terms of programming her own blog.
Check it out!

You will agree that she is nothing short of amazing!



On Another Note

Today is a good friend’s birthday. She probably wouldn’t want me to mention her name on here, but she’s a great person. Very caring and sweet.

So if you believe that your positive thoughts can reach her, feel free to leave her a message here!


Cheers, all!

USS Spam

USS SPAM

More junk mail has been piling up. Surely I must have done something horrible in a previous life to warrant such attention from these evil folk.

Last time, I wrote these odd spam names into an office scenario.

This time, I think I will change the setting to a naval vessel.

Let’s see what happens…


Concatenated H. Flagstaff – Admiral Flagstaff is one of the most successful men in the navy. He’s won more battles than any other tactician in history. The only problem he’s ever had was when he took a shot to the crotch from an errant golf ball, destroying his manhood. He has since undergone several operations to regain his once mighty member. You will find him at the helm of his aircraft carrier: The USS Spam

Technician B. Muskett – Muskett is the gearhead of the aircraft carrier. When not working on inspecting and reparing aircraft, you will find him below decks, trying to create the most elaborate beer-drinking device since the dual-can hat with two straws. Admiral Flagstaff can count on Muskett to solve the technical problems of the ship.

Shape M. Pompadoured – Shape is second in command on the USS Spam. She is tougher than Flagstaff in many ways. She is physically intimidating, as she is in exceptional physical condition. She also towers over everyone, choosing to wear her lenghty hair completely up in the front. Ace Ventura has nothing on Shape. Drop and give her twenty!

Modifying S. Alkaline – Moddie spends most of her time tinkering around with the ship’s nuclear generator. You can see her puttering around in her goggles in the bowels of the ship. She doesn’t really say all that much. She’s a slippery character, sliding through life like a bar of soap, avoiding all duties she deems unnecessary so that she can be with her beloved power source.

Deliberated O. Brooches – Deliberated is the head cook and special advisor to the Admiral. He has seen action long before anyone on this ship had graduated from high school. A peek into his closet will reveal a coat covered in glimmering pins and medals. Most people call him Deli for short because he makes mean sandwiches. But Admiral Flagstaff knows that he is much more than that.

Cameo J. Oblongs – Cameo is seen about the ship far less than Moddie. She is the ship’s medic. She’s top in her field, administering care to those who need it. However, she does this via Post-It notes because she is extremely shy of her long nose and gangly arms. Most people on the ship who have ever been sick will find a bottle of pills that magically takes care of the problem without ever even stepping into the sick bay. Come to think of it, no one knows where the sick bay is…

Negatived L. Returned – Neg is the eyes and ears of the ship. Bouncing radar and sonar off of the surrounding area, he reads the signs on the scopes and lets the Admiral know what’s going down on and in the great big sea. Not too much escapes his attention. Not too much escapes his sardonic with and pessimism either. The Admiral must really appreciate Neg’s skills at observation, otherwise this sourpuss would get the old heave-ho.


And so, the USS Spam sails the seven seas, looking for adventure.

Feel free to e-mail me if you have suggestions for what kind of story the next volley of spam-influenced characters should be involved in.

Cheers!

Retrospective

Auld Lang Syne

The end is drawing near.

What have you accomplished this year?

It’s been an interesting year here on Barking Space. I thought that I would go through some of the highlights of 2005. Hopefully this will not be as painful as one of those clip shows that you see on sitcoms.



In the Beginning…

At the end of January, Barking Space went online. With a little nudge from a few people (most noteably Dave), I took the plunge and started writing online.

Why did I bother?

At the end of 2004, I took my passion for photography and started to groom it into something more than just a hobby. I decided that I would use the blog to push my photography. I also figured it would be something fun to try. Of course, quite a number of people had already been doing it for a long time, so there were a lot of good examples to follow*.

Somehow the photography angle wasn’t as dominant a force on the blog as I had planned. Writing was something I used to enjoy doing when I was younger, and now the opportunity to take it to a new level had presented itself.

It was an interesting experience, writing my thoughts for all the world to see. Remarkably, some people found what I had to say interesting. I discovered a whole new community, which led to the formation of some new friendships.

I can safely say that blogging is just as much fun now as it was back then. If anything, naming the titles most entries is still something fun to do.



The Creative Juices…

A little later in the year, some new features were added.

Hai-Kuul was initiated to help me keep my poetic skills** up to snuff. People could send in a topic, and in return I would write them a haiku poem. At first, a veritable flood of entries poured in.

The awarding of prizes to certain milestone requests didn’t help stem the flow.

Later on in the year, limitations were placed on the number of topics one could submit at one time. This was more to help my sanity than anything. The creation of good poetry isn’t easy. Sometimes too much material can be as hard to deal with as too little.

That being said, I am proud to say that once in a while I did write something I was proud of. At last count we hit haiku number 893.

The Fig-tionary was born at around the same time as Hai-Kuul. The idea behind the Fig-tionary was to allow people to justify their typos. While not as numerous as haiku poems, these alternate definitions were rewarding in the sense that they took a bit more thinking.

Let’s also not forget that there’s a Guide to Toronto on this page as well. Not the most accurate thing, to be sure, but definitely fun to read.



Anec-Do’s and Anec-Don’ts

Barking Space was a showcase for many of the interesting*** stories and ponderings.

The occasional rant also made it into Barking Space.

Blogging about things like this is a very convenient thing. Sometimes you have a story that a lot of people would find interesting. Repeating this story becomes tiresome. Or perhaps a critical part of the story is forgotten.

Solution?

Write it down.

Blogging is an excellent way to share events in your life. If people want to read them, they can. So it’s really a non-invasive form of communication.

Sharing rants can also be therapeutic, especially when you realize how many allies you might have out there in e-land to help you battle in the war against stupidity.



Friendships Found and Fortified

This year also saw the introduction of many new and interesting people into my life. I’m not going to bother naming them here, because they know who they are.

It’s a strange feeling when you first meet someone in the flesh who has, up to that point, been merely words on a screen. The most interesting of these meetings has to be my evening with Kris. It was incredible how we clicked. Even my wife really got along with her.

Ian was fun to meet, as well. I’d known him for longer than Kris and had spoken with him on the phone prior to our get-together.

There were also friends who started blogging because I told them that they should.

And who could forget the incredible Dave? Always there to help you up to your feet when you’ve fallen, and to trip you when you’re getting ahead of yourself. A better friend no one could ever ask for. He also provided a lot of the more humourous material here on Barking Space.

Please check out the Tome for really great people to read.



The Best For Last

Of course, I’d like to take this opportunity to thank my wife, who is one of the most incredible people on the planet.

Without her, I don’t think I would be who I am today.



My Wish To You

This year has been full of fun and laughter. From making my way up the Karate ladder to Brown Belt to meeting Mestre Acordeon. So much has happened, and I am glad that I could share it with all of you.

I hope that 2006 is even better than 2005.

May you all party hard, and stay safe****.

Cheers and Happy New Year,

Jorge






* – There were unfortunately a lot more bad examples. In true optimistic form, I decided to use these as guides of what not to do.
** – Some would refer to my poetry as bad comedy, I’m sure.
*** – Interesting to me. Yes, there is no end to my ego.
**** – While you’re at it, you might want to get off your butts and vote for a 10th entry for Best of Barking Space.

Hai-Kuul – December 28, 2005

Nightshifts (Requested by anurs2)
In the world of health
Sometimes more problems happen
When the sun goes down


Love is Blind (Requested by anurs2)
If love wasn’t blind
There would be a lot of folks
Without a partner


I Hate Christmas (Requested by anurs2)
What is going on?
The best of holidays is
Now so commercial





*Remember, you can submit a topic to inspire your very own Haiku Poem by clicking here. You can read about Hai-Kuul here.

Convo

Dave and Jorge Convo Part 12: Return of the Stupey

Dave is holding a 24 hour movie marathon soon. He sent out a list of movies for us to rank so that we might come up with a group of movies to watch.

The following short discussion revolves around one of the movies in question.

I am not so smart, it seems. Dave, however, was on fire…


Jorge: The Thin Blue Line? Is that like The Thin Red Line?
Dave: No. The Thin Red Line is a war movie.
J: Really? I thought Clint Eastwood was in The Thin Red Line.
D: No.
J: Isn’t that movie about some guy trying to protect the president?
D: That’s In the Line of Fire.
J: Whatever. As long as the word line is in there, it’s all the same.
D: So it’s the same as The Line, the Witch and the Wardrobe?


Dave is a bastard.