• If you read this blog, you should be committed. Seriously.
  • Calendar

    February 2026
    S M T W T F S
    1234567
    891011121314
    15161718192021
    22232425262728
  • Recent Comments

    Unknown's avatarHalfway Up the Stair… on Oh, We’re Halfway T…
    Beth's avatarBeth on Goodbye, Mom
    Jorge's avatarJorge on MM10 – 24 Hour Movie Marathon…
    Jorge's avatarJorge on Got Me On My Knees
    Jorge's avatarJorge on Got Me On My Knees
  • Categories

  • Archives

  • 24 Hour Movie Marathon A Night at the Opera anxiety Audition Awesome Banlieue 13 Birthdays Bloopers Brother Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid Camping Canada Cancer Cat Children Conversations Death Race 2000 Delirious depression Dirty Harry District 13 Dolemite Eddie Murphy FAIL Family Forbidden Planet Friend Friends Friendship Fun Fundraising Funny Gaming Glengarry Glen Ross Government Hai-Kuul Haiku Halloween Health Humour Kids Life Lifeboat Love Memorial Men's Health Men's Mental Health Mental Health Movember movember 2025 Movember Foundation Movie Marathon Movies Music New Year Oldboy On the Waterfront Parents programs Prostate Cancer Remembrance research Shaun Hatton Spam Stupid suicide prevention testicular cancer The Iron Giant The Mist The Oh In Ohio The Way of the Gun Toronto Toronto Thumbs Tremors Writing
  • Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

    Join 3,446 other subscribers
  • How Many?

    • 156,009 hits
  • Meta

  • MyFreeCopyright.com Registered & Protected

Knock Three Times…

Story Time

On Saturday night, I told our unborn child (McFiggy) a story for the first time.

Apparently the baby responds to my voice, becoming quite active and raising a ruckus. I hope this is a good thing.

Most times, there will be visible evidence of McFiggy’s activity. Usually McFiggy will deliver a good shot, sufficient to make Mrs. J’s belly show a bump for a second. Never more than one at a time, and always with a significant amount of time in between them

I rested my head on Mrs. J’s belly and told the story of the Three Little Pigs.

The story seemed well received.



No Freakin’ Way…

Sunday night we were settling in. Mrs. J asked me if I was going to tell McFiggy a story that night.

I wanted Mrs. J to get some shut eye, so I said I would have storytime the next night.

Then there was a bump from the belly, indicating that there was an interested party. I looked at Mrs. J and asked her if we could let the baby decide.

She agreed.

I put my cheek on the belly and said…


Hey you. It’s your Dad. If you want me to tell you a story, give me two bumps, please.


A few seconds…

Then…


BUMP! BUMP!


Then nothing.

How could anyone not think that is awesome?

So last night was all about Jack and the Beanstalk.



Test?

I was telling Dave about this. He thought it was cool and suggested using this phrase the next time…

Okay, it’s your Dad. If you want me to tell a story, do the drum beat from We’re Not Gonna Take It…

Lemme ‘Splain. No. Too Long. Lemme Summup.

The Year in Review

I suppose that at some point before the calendar page turns each of us should look back and take stock of what has transpired over the last twelve months. It’s not always an easy thing to do. Most things that we don’t need to do are difficult.

Some of us human beings are preoccupied with keeping score. Trying to make sure that we come out on top.

Interestingly enough, if we want to come out on top, we always will. We always have the option of eclipsing the bad with the good if we like. Of course, this can also work in reverse.

There are those among us who never deal with the negative things that they have done (especially to others). These people coast through life wreaking havoc, never stopping to clean up the messes that they leave.

I think it takes more strength to look back on the bad things and see what benefit you can gain from something that possibly took a chunk out of you.

I had originally written a long post about my trials and tribulations this year. After reading it for the nth time, I came to the decision to delete it.

It sounded too whiny. Too negative. The whole point was to try and find the positives in the bad things that happened. But there weren’t enough solutions.

So I’m going to keep it to myself. My own list of things to work on. Inevitably I can see a lot of you trying to put forth pep-talks and such. But I don’t really need those. What I need to do is take care of my own list by myself (maybe with a little help from my friends).

So in place of my giant article, I offer up this vague list to sum up my year…


  • Exercise disappointment
  • 24-Hour Movie Marathon goodness
  • Unspeakable loss
  • Great times with friends
  • Visiting our treasure in the South
  • A pleasant surprise
  • Unreasonable fears
  • Energy renewed
  • Another loss
  • A visit from our treasure from the South
  • A house
  • Hitting my wall for the first time in a long time
  • Coming up with a plan to overcome the wall
  • Making a new, very great friend
  • Counting myself lucky to have solid friendships


Trust me, you would have fallen asleep at the original post.

DC Longest Saturday Sad

DC Comes to TO

This past weekend, our dear friend Kris visited us all the way from DC.

When Mrs. J and I met Kris last October, we fell in love with the blue-eyed goddess of awesomeness.

Kris is someone that will always leave a warm, fuzzy impression in your heart.



Longest Short Flight Ever

Due to the fact that Kris was using points to fly, she had a ridiculous layover. I think the whole trip took something like eight hours. What a trooper.

Of course, she never told me which terminal she would be landing at, so I drove around like a goof trying to divine the answer. After a while, I gave up and phoned my wife who is all things travel, and she pointed me in the right direction.

After picking up Kris, we picked up Mrs. J from her office and headed home. We drove past our new place and then spent the evening in, eating pizza and drinking wine (Mrs. J had to have some creative non-alky drinks).

It was nice to have Kris all to ourselves.



Saturday Night, Saturday Night

Well, we have to start with Saturday day, first.

We slept in, had a big breakfast and then all took naps again.

After that, we headed downtown to the CN Tower but were stonewalled by a huge lineup. So much for lunch in the revolving restaurant.

After another failed attempt to secure a cool dining place, we ended up at Jack Astor’s and had a big lunch.

Then it was time to return home. I picked up some lattes from Starbucks, and poured some drinks for everyone.

Shortly after our guests arrived…


We all enjoyed some WhyNattes and then headed out for dinner and drinks.

Much fun was had by all. We were joined by Mike and his awesome wife Heidi, our friends Natalie, Brad and Phung, as well as some of their friends. It was a great evening.

Even Beth called my cellphone to participate in the event from afar!

Dave wrote about the evening here.


Sundays Make Me Sad

After closing the bar floor, we left via cab and arrived home. We were all snug in our beds at around three in the morning.

A few hours later, it was time to wake up and take Kris to the airport.

It felt like the weekend was so short.

One can never spend enough time with Kris.

Thanks for coming up, Mama. We miss you already!

An extra-special thanks to Mrs. J for putting up with our drunken antics and chauffeuring us around on Saturday night.

What Happens at White Birch, Stays at White Birch…

…Except These Fun Tidbits…

  • Kwai Chow
  • You’re never too old to dance in your PJs.
  • Nature Gods are fickle.
  • People up North really like pumpkins.
  • I have disgraced myself by dancing to both Sexyback and London Bridge within the span of one hour.
  • Lumight cumandumel numnow!
  • Ping pong is not necessarily easier when using two paddles simultaneously.
  • Axe body spray does not attract women. It attracts flies.
  • Barefoot, you say?


Needless to say, a good time was had by all.

The Passing of My Excellent Euchre Partner

Who?

Her name was Myrtle.

When Mrs. J and I started getting more serious (before she was Mrs. J, and was simply Miss T), we started doing the required rounds, visiting the relatives. This, of course, included grandparents. As I had lost my grandparents already, it was a pleasure to meet some new ones.

I was happily welcomed with open arms by each and every one of them. Myrtle was no exception.

Right from the get go she made me feel like a member of the family. Abiding by my silly ways and youthful impertinence with nods and smiles, giving me cookies and great chats.

In her demeanour and dress she was very traditional. Very prim and proper. She would always be done up when we would visit, things always in their place. Her clothing and surroundings were always constant. A comfort in an ever-changing world.

For all of the formality, though, there was also mischeviousness and fun.



Es Tu?

She was outspoken. She was quick. A razor-sharp wit hidden beneath the pleasant, wrinkled exterior of a sweet old lady. Commentary on current events (sometimes in the room) could easily be missed if you weren’t paying attention.

It was one of my guilty pleasures to watch Grandma in action, revelling in the subtleties of her honest sense of humour.

As wonderfully funny as she could be, she could also make the sun shine like a beacon through the gloom of your bad days in ways that only a grandmother could.



The Best Way to a Man’s Heart…

Who could forget the warm, comforting feeling of biting into one of Grandma’s home-made butter tarts with raspberry filling. Arguably the greatest butter tart of them all.

She would always have a batch baked for us when we visited.

Sometimes the path to getting some was convuloted, as she would make us work for it by teasing us with the promise of their sweet goodness and then sighing and saying that maybe we didn’t really need them for some reason or another.



Pick It Up. I’m Going Alone

What goes better with home-made butter tarts than a rousing game of euchre?

When we visited them at the unit in which they lived, we would see a euchre standings chart in the lobby by the elevators. Grandma’s name was always near the top of the list (usually following Duncan, her husband and euchre partner).

Mrs. J would be Grandpa’s partner, and Grandma and I would usually deliver unholy punishment unto them.

Grandma was a top-notch card-player. She’d spend most of her time disguising her strategies by taking pot-shots at her opponents, intimidating them by tapping the cards on the table and telling them to hurry up.



Twilight

Unfortunately, like all good things, Grandma was starting to fade, physically.

While her wit was still sharp and her outlook stoic, she began to show signs of deterioration.

She stopped baking tarts. Her card shuffles were starting to get a bit slower and clumsier. She was tired all the time.

But even with all that, she always managed a smile and a hug. She was always ready to show you her love in her own, quiet way.



My Favourite Memories

I like to remember people by the good they did. Everyone, good and bad, touches your life in a way that leaves positive impressions somewhere, if you care to look. Here are some of my favourite memories…

  • How she would be Grandpa’s navigator in the car. When we’d reach a stop sign, he’d look left, and she’d look right. When it was safe to go (usually) they would proceed. They drove as a single unit.
  • The smile on her face when Mrs. J tried her hand at knitting a sweater. Grandma was so proud that someone had taken up the challenge of what is still a mystery to me.
  • Heard from Grandma during more than one game of euchre: It doesn’t matter what card you throw down, because it’s not going to do you any good…
  • Before Mrs. J and I got married, I wasn’t sure what to call Grandma. She was introduced as Myrtle, but for all intents and purposes she was like a grandma to me. At our wedding, I looked at her and said, I suppose that I can finally call you grandma now, to which she replied, That would be just fine, dear. Just fine.
  • During a birthday picnic in her honour (held on some land that they owned), she took us into the shed and secretly gave us a heaping helping of butter tarts that she had baked. Our very own horde that probably would not have survived the journey home if we weren’t so full from birthday foodstuffs.
  • The time she looked me right in the eye and told me she loved me. That she loved both of us very much.



Grandma, you will be missed. You will always be in our hearts.


Love,
Me


PS: Don’t think you’re out of the woods, as I’ll be counting on you for help when next I need a winning lone hand.