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Nicely Said and Done, K-Rotstitute

I’ve been told in no uncertain terms that my semi-weekly entries are missed. So without further ado…



If You Can’t Say Anything Nice…

I was on the subway this morning, and it was crowded. All seats were taken, and standing room was tuna-can style (not to be confused with toucan style, which involves a lot of people with big multicoloured noses hanging about).

There was a guy at the back of the subway who was speaking to a female friend. His choice of words was a little bit inappropriate for the subway, considering how loudly he was talking. Not to mention he seemed to enjoy talking like a rap star, with all the cool words he was using, and his inflection.

Reay mentioned something about this once. He spoke of how people nowadays seem to feel the need to talk loudly. Most of what Mr. Jackass on the subway was talking about was how he wasn’t about to step off and about how backin’ down ain’t what he was born to do. Please don’t get me wrong. I use the occasional expletive, and I don’t see anything wrong with them provided they are used in the right time and place, but when all you say is how cool you are, and how no one is going to fucking mess witchu and there are children about, you need your face planted into quick dry cement.

Children are sponges for things like this, and I felt really bad for the mother who looked very upset at the fact that dinkus maxiumus felt it necessary to share his feelings with the entire subway car.



And You Did That Because…

Today was a bonus day, as I got to experience two acts of stupidity in the same subway trip.

We had just left the last station before a connection point, where I usually get off the Eastbound and grab the Southbound. An older lady started moving away from the doors toward the back of the subway – the furthest point from the doors. It appeared that she was going to be giving people room by moving away from the doors. She inconvenienced a hell of a lot of people, and almost knocked a few of them over. She ended up residing between the swearing guy I spoke of earlier and his friend (which was the only good thing to come out of this).

We arrive at the connection point, and this same lady, who spent a significant amount of time and other people’s patience to get away from the doors, charges back towards the door, bowling people over so she could get out. Why the hell didn’t she just stay where she was?

If someone could explain this type of behaviour to me, I would appreciate it. I have a degree in Psychology, and I don’t understand what is going on in their heads.



Today I Become A K-Rotstitute

Today I will be my first time helping out in a kids class at the dojo. It’s been a long time since I have had anything to do with helping children out in martial arts. I used to teach classes in Taekwondo a long time ago, so it will be interesting to see how it goes….

Toronto Dollar Made No Cents For Me, Angus

No Sale

So the show has come and gone, and I sold nada. This is a little upsetting (as I sit here drinking a comfort Café Mocha). I was hoping to sell something to defray the costs of a show coming up.

I had this naive idea in my head that there were going to be a lot of wealthy people in fur coats and top hats walking around, twirling their canes and adjusting their monacles. I expected them to be pulling their gloves on and off in anticipation of outbidding their fellow richies…


Lord Melbourne: I say, old chap, [Pointing at one of my prints.] what is this you have drawn?
Jorge: It’s not a drawing, it’s a photograph. It’s a photograph of some tigers.
Lord Melbourne: Excellent. I will bid one thousand dollars on this item.
Lady Weslet: Oh no you don’t, my old friend! I will bid two thousand dollars!
Lord Melbourne: Jeeves! Oh, Jeeves!
Jeeves: [Runs up.] Yes, sir?
Lord Melbourne: Please fetch me my money, Jeeves. And perhaps fetch a chaise lounge for Lade Weslet to fall back upon after I outbid her.
Lady Weslet: Oh, you rotter. Fine, but I will outbid you on the next one.
Jeeves: Will there be anything else, sir?
Lord Melbourne: No, that is all. Now run along and fetch me my coin, good man. [Smacks Jeeves on the butt.]
Jeeves: [Sighs] Very good sir. [Runs off.]
Monopoly Man: Is it too late to bid on Park Place?


This is not really how it turned out.

Even though I didn’t sell anything to fabulously wealthy people, I met some really great artists and made some new friends. One of them is moving away, and she gave me her easel, which is awesome. A lot of my business cards were taken as well, so that’s pretty cool.

All in all, not such a bad time.

Here are some of the artists I met/befriended/pickpocketed. You can click on some of their names to see their work…


Tina Newlove – She was one of the first to arrive. I laughed because I had recently seen Napoleon Dynamite, and so I asked her if she did, and she said yes. I immediately saidTina, come get some ham! We laughed. She is awesome, and has some great work.

Liana Russwurm – No web page that I know of, but she is a great painter. If you hear of her being shown at a local gallery, you should go!

Jamie Bradbury – Another great painter without a web page. His stuff was really neat. He won an award last night for a huge painting he did.

Sherrie Wilkins – Sherrie was hilarious. We spent most of the evening cutting each other up. Her photos remind me of images my wife has taken. She also gave me the easel! We had each other’s back when the Angus burger was calling from across the street.

Mark Furman – Mark really helped me out last night. He had easels and a really cool idea to display his pictures. He let me hang some of my stuff on the structure he fabricated, and let me use his easels. I think a lot of people thought our stuff was shot by the same person, which is a great compliment. You can see his work at the Contact photo festival in May at the Relax Shack in the Junction (3026 Dundas St W – Toronto).


I will also be in Contact (just down the street from Mark, actually), displaying my work in Cornerstone Furniture (2886 Dundas Street W – Toronto). I’ll keep people posted regarding this upcoming show.



Shrinkage

Can anyone tell me what the deal is with the Angus Burger at Harvey’s? They used to be huge! Now they are at least half the thickness, yet still the same price. Harvey’s position in my list of places to eat has fallen to a new low.

Strikes Out With Lost Wife’s Helpfulness

No Strike Today – Yay Me!

And so it was, that the TTC has decided to wait until Friday to see if they Strike on Monday.

This is good for me, because it means I didn’t have to stay home today and lug my photos across town. Photos do not seem to be a heavy burden until you put them in frames, and have to walk several miles in the rain to get to where you want to go (which would probably be two hours).

Another positive thing about a delayed strike is that more people may come to the Toronto Dollar Party where I will be exhibiting some of my photography tonight.

YES!



Best Wife Ever

Well, I guess that implies that I have had more than one wife. This is not the case.

Nor am I married to a vocation or career. Academia? Pfft. Broke up with that whore a long time ago.

Thus, while the title of this section is probably not really necessary to put into print, it is 100% accurate and I believe it should be stated for the record.

I wasn’t in a good mood yesterday (we all get that way from time to time), and as usual, my wife is very patient and supportive. We had dinner, and then she went to place some phone calls, and I went upstairs to blow off some steam playing Lego Star Wars.

She later came upstairs and entered my office. She smiled, and I asked the dreaded question…

Do you want to play?

She actually said yes, and sat down with me and we ran through a couple of levels together.

Talk about awesome.

Most of the girls reading this are probably wincing right now. My wife has probably been kicked out of some secret club or another for playing video games with me.



Lost

The show is really starting to pick up. Lots of weird things are happening and the characters are all maturing. It’s good to see.

Saywer, for example, has become a bit nicer. I notice that when he does something nice, they put less grease in his hair. It’s very odd. He was even helpful to Kate, as displayed in this slightly altered excerpt….


Kate: Sawyer I need all your alcohol.
Sawyer: Yesss, preciousssss, alcohols you needses, alcohols you getses.
Kate: Huh?
Sawyer: [Trundles off to his suitcases and starts to tear through them looking to help Kate.] Yes, Kate. Alcoholses. Here! Takes it all!
Kate: Er, thanks.
Sawyer: Good Smeago…er…Sawyer always helps….Freckles…


I don’t know why I typed that, but it’s funny. Well, it is to me, anyway.

Sweating and Nerdism

TTC Strike Looms

And here I sit, sweating.

Wondering if the TTC will actually strike at midnight or not.

It couldn’t really happen at a worse time. I have a show tomorrow (see Toronto Dollar’s Web Page), and I will be bringing four framed prints with me, as well as a bunch of other stuff that would be inconveneint and possibly dangerous to carry on my back while I ride my bike which hasn’t been tuned up for over a year and a half.

It’s a long walk. Doable, but long.



What the Hell? *

I was somehow magically subscribed to a comic book newsletter, and what do I see but the return of Hal Jordan.

Somebody pinch me. Hard. On the eyes.

Why is Hal Jordan coming back? I decided to do a quick sweep of the WWW about anything related to the death of Green Lantern. What I found scared the crap out of me. After Hal Jordan’s character died in the DC Universe, there was an outcry of angry fans. There were website shrines erected. There were petitions sent. There was a mass obsession with the resurrection of a comic book character.

Wow.

I’ve lost a lot of respect for most mainstream titles. They are continuously trying to figure out ways to appeal to the masses, and all the while they continuously butcher the continuity of really great stories.

I personally have no problem with characters like Superman having a nice solid origin, and growing older, suffering the loss of loved ones and the like, all for the sake of a great continuous storyline.

But this revolving door policy just makes me laugh.




* – This is a nerdy comic-book-based post, so the majority of you can ignore this. Haha. Too late.

Shamelessly Reminiscing

Driving Down Memory Lane

Friday night I hung out with Shatton and Aggies. I arrived there in the evening, and we went to go pick up dinner from an Indian place on Kennedy Rd in B-dot. The drive to the restaurant was interesting, because we drove along a part of Kennedy that my parents used to take us to when we were kids.

Much to my surprise, the restaurant we went to pick up our food from is the same place that we used to eat at when I was younger, and living in Brampton.

Weird.

The food is still good, too!

After this we watched various episodes of Adult Swim cartoons, and played Bomberman until the wee hours of the morning.  Aggies went home, and Shatton and I watched Freaks and Geeks.

It was great to spend time with someone as brown as I am.



Shameless Plug

If anyone lives in Toronto and has nothing to do on Thursday night (April 07), come on down to the St. Lawrence Market area. I will have a table there, and will be showing some of my work!

If you don’t know what I’m talking about, click on the Photography link on the right side of this blog.

10% of the proceeds raised by our sales goes to charity.