Comments on: Hai-Kuul – June 14, 2005

By: Clara19822

Clara19822 — Thu, 10 May 2007 16:21:02 +0000

all these haikus during ur lunch break?!!! crazy!!!! but cool. question: why is ur name pronounced “george” and not “hor-he?” we were just wondering….

By: St-Martini-of-the-Vodka

St-Martini-of-the-Vodka — Thu, 10 May 2007 16:20:45 +0000

Remember when you used to post about the happy events of your life? Whatever happened to Jorge?

By: BeansAngel1

BeansAngel1 — Thu, 10 May 2007 16:19:59 +0000

Hi Jorge…. Happy Say Something Nice Day. Jorge, you’re a great person. I can say that in my “bloggers opinion” There needs to be more people like you in the world. Have a great one! Linette

By: WizenedDragonPK

WizenedDragonPK — Thu, 10 May 2007 16:19:40 +0000

Back from the overcast skies of lovely Amsterdam only to find that the inspiration that takes me through my day will be slowly drying up! Good to know that it is not the end of creativity! I can sympathize with the lack of available time – however, I have to admit that you’ve been keeping up to the requests quite admirably! And after finally returning to the wide open spaces of this wonderful country we call Canada, I would love to request two little haikus:
1) Pets that miss you
2) Dutch coffeeshops

Hope that things are going great!

By: EricLippert

EricLippert — Thu, 10 May 2007 16:19:10 +0000

Perfect! Now that’s what I call a haiku! And I’m certainly not saying that your other efforts are not products of craftsmanship. I’m saying that some of them are better crafted than others. Compare, say, “Just Eat It” with “No One”. “Just Eat It” has it all — universal emotional impact, a surprising metaphor and a wry but entirely apropos punchline. One can sympathize both with the child looking with disgust at those wrinkled green eyeballs and the impatience of the parent narrator. Like all good haikus, it’s a little gem, a little bundle of emotion and experience that unfolds line by line. “No One” on the other hand really isn’t an example of the form — the “door” belongs logically and emotionally to the second line, not the third. It’s just on the third to make the syllable count work out. Same with “Stupid Ex”. The emotion is there. The wry punchline is there. But the continuation of the idea of the second line into the third is jarring. I really like “Haircut”. There’s a short story you should read by Stanislaw Lem — it’s the chapter of The Cyberiad about the poetry-writing computer that gets out of control. There’s a poem about a haircut in there — six lines, cleverly rhymed, full of tragedy and loss — which gave me the idea for this haikuul. That The Cyberiad was translated from Polish gives me great respect both for the author and Michael Kandell, the translator. Check it out!